THE UNDERPINNINGS OF FRIENDSHIP
Posted in Uncategorized on January 3rd, 2007There is a frightfully good article over at the Psychology Today site - Friendship: The Laws of Attraction. Several interesting points are raised.
- The valuing of a friend is more determined by what you do for them, than what they do for you
- Emotional gifts are more important than physical gifts
- Support of chosen identity is of primary importance
I find the last to be most interesting. It illuminates why some of my ‘best’ friends are those with whom I share my particular hobby, gaming. Since I identify as a gamer (some times very fiercely), it makes sense that those people I game with would become fast friends.
The article also goes into some detail about the steps necessary in maintaining friendships, and that is something I can use a kick in the pants about. One of my weaknesses has always been the maintenance of friendships in cases where regular face-to-face contact is not possible. Some of my friends have moved to other cities and it is hard for me to keep those valuable connections. I have recently started a campaign of regularly emailing those folks, and the emotional pay off has been high.