Archive for the 'Uncategorized' Category

THE UNDERPINNINGS OF FRIENDSHIP

Posted in Uncategorized on January 3rd, 2007

There is a frightfully good article over at the Psychology Today site - Friendship: The Laws of Attraction.  Several interesting points are raised.

  1. The valuing of a friend is more determined by what you do for them, than what they do for you
  2. Emotional gifts are more important than physical gifts
  3. Support of chosen identity is of primary importance

I find the last to be most interesting.  It illuminates why some of my ‘best’ friends are those with whom I share my particular hobby, gaming.  Since I identify as a gamer (some times very fiercely), it makes sense that those people I game with would become fast friends.

The article also goes into some detail about the steps necessary in maintaining friendships, and that is something I can use a kick in the pants about.  One of my weaknesses has always been the maintenance of friendships in cases where regular face-to-face contact is not possible.  Some of my friends have moved to other cities and it is hard for me to keep those valuable connections.  I have recently started a campaign of regularly emailing those folks, and the emotional pay off has been high.