In the end, what matters is not do ‘they’ respect you, rather what matters is do you respect you.
I have always struggled with not being so concerned about what people thought of me. I have had some good progress over the years. Unfortunately the thought, ‘I don’t care what other people think about me’, morphed stealthfully into, ‘I don’t care what bad things other people think about me’. On the surface that seems not a bad thought to carry around, however there is poison under it’s surface, and it has done it’s work. What the thought ‘I don’t care what bad things other people think about me’ easily becomes is, ‘My opinion of myself, and my achievments, is based on the good things other people say they think about me.’ That’s bad. No one can measure me, but me. I am the only judge who has full access to all information about where I am in my goals, and how active I am in persuing them. By taking in the praise of others, and basing my self worth on it, I open myself to all sorts of problems. The biggest one is erosion of confidence when others aren’t on the ball enough to constantly remind me of how cool I am.
I am my own taskmaster. I am my own measure. Don’t get me wrong, it’s great when people tell each other the great things they see in each other. If anything it should happen more often. But, for moment to moment living it is not their voice that matters. I am the only one who has to live with me 24/7, and I am the only one who can constantly state my opinion of where I am in my path. That is the voice that matters, and that is the voice that must be heeded.
RESPECT – Deciding Whose Opinion Really Matters
In the end, what matters is not do ‘they’ respect you, rather what matters is do you respect you.
I have always struggled with not being so concerned about what people thought of me. I have had some good progress over the years. Unfortunately the thought, ‘I don’t care what other people think about me’, morphed stealthfully into, ‘I don’t care what bad things other people think about me’. On the surface that seems not a bad thought to carry around, however there is poison under it’s surface, and it has done it’s work. What the thought ‘I don’t care what bad things other people think about me’ easily becomes is, ‘My opinion of myself, and my achievments, is based on the good things other people say they think about me.’ That’s bad. No one can measure me, but me. I am the only judge who has full access to all information about where I am in my goals, and how active I am in persuing them. By taking in the praise of others, and basing my self worth on it, I open myself to all sorts of problems. The biggest one is erosion of confidence when others aren’t on the ball enough to constantly remind me of how cool I am.
I am my own taskmaster. I am my own measure. Don’t get me wrong, it’s great when people tell each other the great things they see in each other. If anything it should happen more often. But, for moment to moment living it is not their voice that matters. I am the only one who has to live with me 24/7, and I am the only one who can constantly state my opinion of where I am in my path. That is the voice that matters, and that is the voice that must be heeded.
“Our life is what our thoughts make it.” – Marcus Aurelius